5dp3dt...The Compulsive Search for the Implantation Bleed and My Little Buddies

Good morning!  It's Sunday, a perfectly normal day to sleep in, snuggle in with the hubby and the puppies.  After all I am hoping and praying that a few months from now sleeping in will be a distant memory.  What a thing to yearn for!  Instead, this girl is totally up. 6am, up, for no reason!  This is my new pattern unfortunately.  I am jealous of others who report that PIO makes them sleep!  I really wish that was the case.  Maybe it's because I stopped my melatonin?  I figure my estrogen is back to normal, so I shouldn't have that  "surgical menopause" can't sleep thing going on.  And yet, not really sleeping great.  I wonder, anyone else try melatonin?  My RE is not on board with me continuing to take it.  But I wonder if anyone else has had that experience?

These two are not happy that mom is out of bed!  They followed me out here grudgingly! But there they are, right by my side, always.  What a comfort to me they are.  The are snuggling a little closer than usual.  I wonder if they know?

Toby Trouble Lafferty (above), Charlie Choo (below).  They are my "beautiful disasters".  Sweet, snugly  bouncing brothers rescued and from the same litter. Half rat terrier, half toy poodle...We call them "weirdy beardies".  They've kissed and snuggled me out of many an "infertility funk".  I was built to nurture someone, they've been happy to be the subject of our affection the past five years.  They'd better be good at sharing!

On to the main topic of today's post, IT has begun. The next few days, days 5-7 past a 3dt, could mean that at any moment...the elusive...the ever exciting...the not often noticed by the "non-IVeffed" (coined by a fellow blogger), the symptom we all compulsively search for, the one and only "implantation bleed" evidence could be upon us.  Yes friends that compulsive behavior of watching closely for that tiny little dot of evidence is occurring.  I have provided a lovely white background for this phenomenon, and I am now engaging regularly in the ridiculous behavior of CLOSE observation.  We will do ANYTHING for a little extra bit of evidence that provides reassurance.  Even if it's gross.  Funny that we end up wishing to see exactly what we would do anything to avoid during non-IVF-IUI cycles....any evidence of AF!

Beyond the a fore mentioned compulsive search for a "symptom", other symptoms to report are:

Light crampiness, lots of peeing, some sharp fleeting pains near my ovaries...which I am "deciding" are due to stretching ligaments there instead of implantation in the tube! My hips are unhappily sore from the PIO, but not nearly as bad as before the implementation of the "Regimen" (see "here is my plan" post for details). My boobs don't hurt as much as last time yet...might still be early for that.  Only a bit sore, with the really sensitive nipple thing going on.

I'm brand spanking new to this blogging thing.  If you happen to stumble across this, I am open to feedback. TMI? Let me know.  I will get better at this whole thing I promise. Thankful for the opportunity to let some of the things I think about......out.  It relieves the pressure, so to speak. Rest in hope and faith friends.  TTYS

Update: there was barely anything to see....just a bit of light brown output.