4dp3dt...Here is my plan

So, this time around I'm way less frantic.  I even made a med mistake that didn't send me into a tail spin (6 extra days on 5 of lupron)....whoops...don't worry, doc said it was fine. Don't get me wrong.  I have analyzed what I could have done differently between the first cycle and this one.  I have employed a problem solving process.  I have logically and rationally decided the following (caution, I am about to totally geek out with IVF language/acronyms, who else cares to hear this stuff besides my sisters who also know to google "4dp3dt"):

1. My endometrial biopsy (the procedure that makes things more "sticky" in there) would be way closer to the embryo transfer this cycle...so points in the "+" column  (I was overstimulated the first time around and couldn't transfer until months after the endometrial biopsy...perhaps the stickiness wore off?)
2. Since last time there was no sign of the babies in my uterus, first beta was 122, second was 643, we didn't bother with a beta after that we were so happy with the results.  You would expect to at least see a sac....but nothing.  This time, whether it makes sense to anyone else or not, I am really resting the prescribed three days, and then adding two for good measure.  So implantation is covered!My friend, a sister to me, questioned the source of this important information.  I challenge her to either verify or offer a replacement, and until then I intend to pour over it at will.
3. This time I will be with my blogging sisters where they are.  I will not look ahead to see if things worked out.  I will not read rambling posts of panicked people about symptoms or no symptoms on TTC support sites.  I will emotionally engage with bloggers where they are, and allow this to be an outlet to me, and I will contribute with supportive comments and also do the work to provide my own support by sharing...thus this blog.  I'm done just browsing and taking.  I am thankful for the support these blogs offered me the first time around.  There is nothing more isolating that this process (see my post re: the poem....line 1)
4. POAS....This time I will only POAS on 7dp3dt, and 9dp3dt with tests that measure 25 or less miu.  Here is why:
• I learned last time that tests vary greatly in sensitivity, gotta make sure that I only use tests that measure the smallest amount of HCG....otherwise with this early testing there is much unnecessary disappointment.
• If I get a positive on 7dp, this will mean to me that I have stronger beta HCG earlier than I did last time, the first positive with the first cycle was 9dp3dt, and those fizzled after the exciting 122 beta, and 643 second beta, I was not aware of said fizzle until the awful empty uterus scan at week 7, worst day ever.  So although it means almost nothing, I will feel illogical comfort if I get even a faint positive on day 7.  
• Also lots of people with multiples report BFPs on day 7.  Since I will not know until week 7 (which is a crime! if they can see a sac at 5 or 6 weeks they should show it to me!!!!! waiting until week 7 is unnecessary torture, especially after my empty uterus last time). If they want me calm, logical, and less stressed, and altogether more pleasant, they need to frigging give me information.  Sorry for the rant. Wait, no I'm not...
5. PIO....here is what I learned about this particular method of torture

• the secret is the a deep 10 min rub of the area before and after the stick
• My hubby uses Palmers to grease the area (dual purpose...if it will possibly ward off stretch marks I am so in)
• I limit heat to no more than 10 min before rub down
• the walk is also a good idea after the shot, but we have thus far failed to implement this step
• my goal is to manage to be in less build up of pain as we (hopefully) progress through the first trimester.  Last time by week seven receiving the shot was awful because of the build up of bruising.  We did not manage to keep up with a system, and I paid for it.
• Giving the shot can be traumatizing to your partner, they need encouragement, they need to know they are not at fault for the evidence before them (your cries of pain, your colorful booty, etc.)
• Do not give a PIO directly after the 10 min on the heating pad, you will have a bleeding geyser on your hands!!!! Not pretty, and traumatizing evidence to the shot giver.

So sorry sisters, about all of the detail.  I hope something useful can be found.  Either way, 4dp3dt, I have my little plan in place.  Through it all though I am absolutely aware that I am not in control of whether or not I get to gaze into the face of one of these babies.  That is up to my Jesus.  I can't mess this up, I can't perform perfectly to get the desire of my heart.  All I can do is rest in the knowledge that right now, they are nestled under my heart, and they know on some level that they are loved by their mother and father.  We are already mothers, each and every one of us.